A Fletcher Cox Suspension for This Hit on Joe Staley Would be El Garbagé

By Chip Bayless

There are rumors swirling right now that Fletcher Cox will be suspended for a block he made on 49ers tackle Joe Staley during an interception return that apparently fractured Staley’s orbital bone, per Pro Football Talk. The NFL is considering suspending Cox (per ESPN’s Adam Schefter) despite the fact that THIS is literally the best video of the play available:


At best, you could argue that Cox gave Staley a hard shove a little too high up. If you watch the block in full speed on the GIF above, one can see that there was no malicious intent here. Cox turned his head and saw Joe Staley about a foot away from his chest and instinctively tried to block him during an interception return, as most professional football players would. Are we actually going to start suspending people for just blocking now?

If the NFL actually suspends the most important player on the Eagle’s defense for this fucking play, then a league-wide conspiracy to ruin the Eagles’ playoff chances will undoubtedly be revealed which includes Goodell, Pete Morelli, and a laundry list of other co-conspirators.

Although, the NFL suspending Cox would have absolutely no effect on Goodell because the man’s job security seems locked in for eternity, much like the only slightly shitty format of our website. The guy blows the Ray Rice situation, tries to suspend Brady with no hard evidence but gets the suspension reversed but is also such a narcissistic egotistical maniac that he pursues the suspension and eventually gets it, then fucks up the Zeke situation the exact same way he fucked up the Brady situation, and yet he appears to have basically already signed a multimillion dollar extension.

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