10 things to do besides watch another NFL season without Josh Gordon:

 

As everyone knows, Josh Gordon is currently suspended indefinitely by the NFL because he smoked weed. Meanwhile, Ray Rice gets suspended two games for knocking his wife out, and Greg fucking Hardy plays an entire season after slamming a girls head repeatedly into a marble bathtub and telling her he’s going to murder her. But don’t worry, because Roger Goodell is making literally millions of dollars a month for making sure Josh Gordon doesn’t consume a substance that has never killed anyone and one that is approved for medical use in most states. Anyways, here’s a list of things to do before watching the 2017 NFL season without Josh Gordon.

10 things to do besides watch another NFL season without Josh Gordon:

  1. Get a bowl cut
  2. Count grass
  3.  Get that sticky armpit feeling when just a little bit of your antiperspirant wears off
  4. Clean leaves out of your gutters
  5. Ride with someone who breaks at the last second for every yellow light
  6. Watch skip Bayless rip on Josh Gordon for smoking weed
  7. Take a strep test
  8. Elect Roger Goodell president of the United States
  9. Communicate an intricate sentence to someone who does not speak any English
  10. Watch every commercial for Nationwide with Peyton Manning that has ever aired

One thought on “10 things to do besides watch another NFL season without Josh Gordon:

  • Avatar
    June 18, 2017 at 9:39 am
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    Big fuckin eh to that. U can beat a bitch but u best not hit a blunt. So makes sense

    Reply

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